


A Poly Miracle

by lowbelowthewater



Category: Epithet Erased (Cartoon)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, I love these three and would die for them., Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-18 08:47:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21974734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lowbelowthewater/pseuds/lowbelowthewater
Summary: The Redwood Trio spends a nice Christmas together, sharing gifts and exchanging threats! Like any normal couple should do!
Relationships: Zora Salazar/Percival "Percy" King/Ramsey Murdoch
Comments: 5
Kudos: 53





	A Poly Miracle

**Author's Note:**

> Overall pretty happy with some parts, but it feels rushed and badly written in other places, but I still enjoyed writing it!

The day shone over a snowy evening, bells jingled as snow continued to fall down from the sun painted sky, Christmas Day, a day of joy and laughter and with spending time with the people you love, sure some people might consider it a bad day due to memories, but all in all it’s supposed to be a day of fun!.

However, no one employs the Christmas spirit much like Ramsey Murdoch, Zora Salazar and Percival “Percy” King, the happy couple that called themselves the Redwood Trio! A throwback to there adventure oh so long ago, around 2 years have passed now, and only 7 months ago Ramsey had finally confessed to the two of them! A Poly amorous relationship you’d call it! And god, they couldn’t be any happier, The three of them really feel like they complete each other!

They were all walking through the snow covered tarmac, boots and shoes crunching against it, they were walking up the local mall, Christmas time was a time for presents after all!! And so with a smile on there faces and a secret in their hearts, our story begins! 

Zora stared down at the Rat man's feet as he trudged through the snow, still wearing sandals in THIS weather? Was he insane?

“Ya’ know Murdoch, Ya don’t have to’ go and where those damn' things all the time, you can wear a pair o’ normal shoes!” She looked forward again and shuddered, even wearing her usual assortment of warmth giving clothes caused her to feel even a slight chill, how the hell was he even managing that?

Ramsey turned around and smiled that golden tooth at her, its light reflecting in the sun, he spoke to her, “Well, I guess Miss Zora aint the big shot she thinks she is huh? Can’t handle a little cold?” Frankly he was freezing his nuts off out here, but he didn’t want them to think that he was weaker than them by staying warm...weird logic, he knows, but his bark is worse than his bite.

Zora turned to him with an angry glare, she pointed at him while walking, her boots trudging against the snow, “Oh, so now ya think yer’ better than me, don’t ya? Well how about I go and shove my boot where the sun don’t shine ya damn rat!-”

Ramsey Immediately retreated to beside his second wife, Percival King, the only real sense of reason they had in there little comradely, “Jeez! I was just makin’ a joke, Ya don’t have to go and threaten me like that!” He tugged at the collar of his sweater to calm him down, looking down at it, It was custom made to read RAT MAN in all capitals, Percy had the idea and was so excited to get Zora and Him sweaters that she screamed the name...the makers took that as wanting it written loudly, but he didn’t have the heart to tell her it was wrong.

She stared him out and pointed to him again, an angry glare on her face, “Then how about ya stop makin’ them dang remarks against me!-”

There Argument was cut off by a loud cough, they both paused and looked between them, a woman shorter than both of them with hair as golden as the sun shining down onto earth, yet a personality so serious it could turn the cheeriest of people sour, but underneath all of that was...just an amazing woman, so full of confidence that it was near impossible for it to not be contagious, she spoke, her voice stern and serious, “Can you both please NOT fight, it’s Christmas day for crying out loud…” She put a hand to her face and merely sighed, it was like this a lot...could they just NOT set their differences aside or something?    


She awaited a response from both of them, and only heard a quiet mumble, she raised her voice now as they continued walking, almost nearing the mall. “I can’t hear you!” they both spoke louder now, shy that they had to be told off like children, “Sorry Percy…” Zora lowered her hat down in an attempt to cover her already reddening face, how the hell was she becoming like this over something so trivial?

Ramsey was the same, though instead of his cheeks turning a rosy pink colour, they shone a bright yellow colour...seemed like his cheeks turned to gold whenever he was embarrassed.

Percy on the other hand...seemed happy that they had stopped, almost ecstatic in fact, did they really argue that often? “See? Isn’t it better when you’re no longer fighting? Now we can actually head inside and pick out gifts!...But first, a little gift for the both of you.” They both turned their heads away for this, they already knew what was coming.

Percy reached to both of them with her lips, and planted a quick peck on both of their cheeks, as a sign of saying “Good job!” she did this regularly, so they already knew what was coming, but that didn’t mean they enjoyed it any less! Honestly it felt like butterflies were moving throughout their whole body...so yeah, it was great. She grabbed both of their hands and began to run forward towards the mall, they both made a shout of protest but it fell on deaf ears...so they both smiled in return, they wanted to get here as fast as possible as well.

\--------------------------------

The Trio had entered the mall and gazed around at the pure sublimity of it, stores upon stores all filled with bustling shoppers with cheery smiles and families alike, the Christmas decorations were in full flare, and the faint sound of Music could be heard playing throughout...they really pulled out all the headlights huh?...Thank god they managed to get here, this was the only mall in a 2 hour journey that was still open on Christmas day...Honestly Percy felt bad for the employees, even SHE had managed to get a day off.

Ramsey tapped Percy on the shoulder and stared at her, before asking a question, “So, how we doin’ this? You get one for Zora, she gets one for me, I get one for you?” He scratched his chin in thought, genuinely curious as to how they were going about this.

Percy nodded and stuck a hand to her chest, her serious tone taking place once again, she needed to make sure there first Christmas together was as successful as it could possibly be, “That sounds about correct Ramsey, now, I want you two to meet back here in 1 hour! That should give you both plenty of time to decide on what to get each other!” Percy already knew the perfect gift to get Zora, one that she knew would drive her into a flushed state...she was smug on the inside but cold on the outside, completely calculated.

Zora stared at the Rat Man with a sly smile, oh, she had the best gift in mind for someone like him, “I’m gonna blow your socks off Rat! My gifts gonna hit you so hard you’ll be grovelling at my boot!.” She needed to find it as quickly as possible, the thing would sell out quickly on a day like this!

Ramsey on the other hand, was already gonna break his end of the bargain...it wasn’t gonna be till night time when they gave each other the gifts, so he had plenty of time for his little..project, he was still gonna get Percy a present after all, no doubt about it...but he couldn’t really be satisfied unless he got them a little something else.

And with that they all broke off, Zora to the end of the mall, Percy went up stairs...and Ramsey went into an art store, he would need a lot of stuff for his almost finished  project..Hopefully they didn’t recognise what it was before the reveal…

\--------------------------------

Percy walked into a rather small store, which in comparison to the other gigantic shops, made it seem like an ant. However, this was the best place to get the gift she wanted, Zora’s been bounty hunting for years of her life yet not once has she ever seen her take Care of her Pistols...she may clean them with her Epithet or something, but it’s better safe than sorry!.

She was Immediately struck with the smell of cleanliness products smashed into her nostrils, bleach, soap, and a variety of other things came together to form the most foul smelling stench she’s ever come to imagine...however, this was the only place she knew of that sold what she wanted, so she needed to persevere, after all if she didn’t get Zora a gift, she’d feel...well, terrible.

She began to walk about, checking the different aisles, However not once had she come across the thing she was looking for...she began to panic slightly, what if it was sold out!? Then what would she do for Zora’s gift! She needed to find this quickly...and so an idea came to her head, one of the employees must know if it’s in stock right?

She left the Aisle and immediately looked around for an employee, searching the whole store...eventually she came across a rather old lady, with a sweet smile, wearing a red shirt with the store name on it, perfect! She went up to her and Immediately began to speak, “Excuse me, but may I ask you something?”

(5 Minutes later)

Percy’s face fell, her always serious look falling into a look of sadness, “C-Can you say that again? Maybe even check in the back or something?” But the old lady merely shook her head side to side, indicating it was a no.

“You’d be surprised at how many people buy that sort of thing sweetie, I’m sorry, but we’re not going to have that in for another 2 weeks at the least...I apologise greatly for that.” She kept a sincere look on her face the entire time when telling her, so...they didn’t have it in store huh?

“That’s fine ma’am...thank you for taking the time to check for me, and happy holidays to you.” Percy left Immediately with a sense of dread on her face, Zora must have already gotten her gift by now and Ramsey would no doubt spend thousands on a gift for Percy with the money he had...while she would go back to them empty handed.

She sighed sadly and went to the entrance, standing there patiently...at least she could wait for them to come back later with their gifts, they at least deserve to give them to each other instead of her

(1 Hour later)

The sound of laughter could be heard coming her way, that same loud and southern Laughter that Zora always expressed, and the hearty rat like chuckle that Ramsey would give off...both of them she loved so much, and yet she hadn’t been able to get ONE gift for Zora...Best to tell them now.

She approached them and saw the wrappings, seems they wanted to cover the gifts as much as possible so the other didn’t see. Her face was still fallen, a frown across it as she realised how much effort they must have put into them...well, no time like the present, right “Ramsey, Zora...before we leave I have something to tell you-” But she couldn’t even begin to tell them, before Ramsey cut her off.

“Sorry Percy, but I really need to get home...I had some uh...bad food on the way here and no way am I usin’ this place, get me?” With that he grabbed her shoulder and led her  outside, seems like they were going to have to do this when they got home, huh?

\--------------------------------

They had trudged back home after a bus ride, around 30 minutes, they probably should have gotten a bus to the mall as well but Frankly they were so excited they never even considered the possibility of it...strange huh?

Ramsey pushed open the door to their house, a rather small one in comparison to what they could have bought, what with Zora’s bounty hunting money and Ramsey’s money that he got from swindling and selling the gold, they probably could have bought something 5x as large as this...but it wouldn’t have given off the same atmosphere that this one did.

It was decorated to the brim with Christmas lights, jingle bells, and a fairly large Christmas tree with an Angel on top, Zora recommend putting a picture of Percy on the top...Percy passed out from that sentence so they couldn’t ask her.

Percy Immediately began to tap them both on the shoulder, “Now may I speak about-” Again, she was interrupted by both of them this time, Ramsey stared at her with a smug yet happy rat toothed grin, his entire face lighting up, “Sorry Percy, but I gotta go and...walk the dog for a couple hours!”

“But we don’t have a-” Before she could finish Ramsey bolted upstairs to his room...well, their room, they all shared a bed...they were both very soft and warm.

Zora on the other hand just said, “Gotta do somethin’ sweetheart! This girls gotta go back to them country roads if ya get what I mean!” She also bolted away, this time to the back yard...which was covered in show, all that was there was a shed with some wood cutting tools. She sighed and just sat down on the couch, placing her head in her hands and sighing...she didn’t want to Interrupt what they were doing after all, it would just be plain rude...and so she resolved to just waiting until they came back...seems she’d have to tell them when they were opening them.

\--------------------------------

It was around 8PM now, and the sun had already set, they had gotten back at around 1PM so it’s been 7 hours so far, the moon shone through the window like a ray, piercing

everything it touched...even Percy’s soul, it was shining directly on her, almost as if it was saying “Shame on you” this wasn’t a situation to get depressed about, or even cry over...it just made her feel both terrible and embarrassed that she wasn’t able to get the gift she wanted for Zora, and that she might end up getting Ramsey to substitute it.

She heard the thrashing of footsteps as Ramsey bolted down the stairs, like a child so eager to get anything...Zora had gotten him something, no doubt, and though they argued so much, they were on of the best Pairs she’s ever seen. “Heya Percy!” was all he said as he waved his hand at her, he didn’t even question why she was sitting like this...strange.

He held a small box in one hand and a much larger one in the other, two gifts?...Huh, she hadn’t even managed to get ONE for Zora and yet he got 2 for her...he really was an amazing husband wasn’t he?

The back door could be heard opening as Zora crashed into the house, a large smile on her face as she walked forward into the room her and Ramsey were sitting, she too held  one present wrapped in one hand, and a larger present in the other...had they both gotten two gifts?

They both sat beside her, Ramsey on the right, Zora on the left...She couldn’t even bring herself to tell them.

“So, which one of us should go first?” Ramsey spoke first, urging either Percy or Zora to show off what they had bought...Zora laughed heartily and proclaimed to Ramsey, “Oh ya Rat! Tryna weasel your way out of goin’ first huh? Or maybe ya just want your gift right now? Either way I respect that...though I wanna leave this little box here for last, it’s pretty special if ya ask me.”

Zora took the massive box she held beside her and held it out, smiling all the while, “Go on Ram! I think I picked out one that suits you pretty well!”

He took the box in his hands and eyed it suspiciously, before holding it up to his ear and shaking it around slightly...he could hear something hitting the box, so it wasn’t empty, and so he stared at Zora while holding the wrapping paper in his hands, “Zora, if this is a damn sex toy, I’m leavin’ you.”

He resulted to slowly tearing the paper away, after a minute, revealing a large brown box...he sighed, and with an idea of what it was, opened it and turned his head away, he turned his head slightly and...smiled brightly, making a sort of “OH!” sound, before taking it out of the box and staring at it.

It was a rather soft pillow that you wrapped around your neck, like the one you would wear during a flight, it was in the colour of Ramsey’s usual attire, red and white with hints of gold on it, he stared at Zora, and she merely chuckled before pulling her standard Cowboy hat down, and spoke, “I know how much I stress you out, what with our constant arguin’...so I thought this would help a bit... “ She was blushing now under her Facade, turning her face away and speaking to him again, “Merry Christmas, my favourite little Rat.”

He could only stare in awe at what she had gotten him before smiling again and speaking to  Zora, “Thanks Zora...I love it.”

He set it aside and stared at Percy now, “Well, guess I gotta go second now, huh?” He reached for the large box now, he had set it on the ground before hand as it couldn’t fit on the couch, what with everyone on here, and so he held it to Percy, before speaking to her, “Come on, open it!” He smiled the whole sentence, indicating how cheery and proud he was of his gift

Percy was contemplating pushing it away, but he had spent so much time thinking about this that it would just be plain rude if she did...and so with a heavy heart she accepted the present, and wanting to get it over with, she tore open the present and the box as well, it was massive honestly, and so when she did, she stared at it before speaking, “Oh my god…”

She lifted out around 7 different products, all in the same box, before looking at Ramsey and seeing him smile slyly, “I haven’t seen you clean that sword of yours, so I thought I’d help out, that’s 7 different things that are basically designed to get rid of...whatever you have on it, and just make it look better.”

She stared at him in awe, before seeing him reach her, and wrapped his arms around her back, before speaking to her, “Merry Christmas Percy.”

He removed himself from the hug, and Zora immediately tapped her on the shoulder, “Well Percy, what’d ya get me? New hat? Maybe even a strap on to peg Ramsey with-”

Ramsey Immediately interjected, pointing a finger at her, “This is Christmas time, not sex time- WAIT NOT THAT EITHER-”

Their argument was interrupted by Percy’s laughter, a soft golden laughter that could turn anyone happy...and then it fell, and she began to speak, “I couldn’t get you the gift I wanted Zora...I apologise greatly…”

She retreated into the couch further, feeling Zora stared at her, was she angry? Sad? Or so pissed she couldn’t put it into words...had she fucked up-

“I don’t mind!” Percy stared at Zora, who was smiling that same smug smirk she always gave off, but with a more...light tone, “I’m a hard woman to shop for, but let me guess, gun cleaning kit? Maybe some hair pins?”

Percy stared at her flabbergasted, was she that easily read? “How on earth did you know!?”

Zora laughed again for around 10 seconds, before wiping a tear from her eyes and looking at Percy, “Ya aint hard to read Percy, heck, chances are I already knew what you were gonna get before you did...but I don’t mind ya didn’t get me nothing, being able to spend Christmas with you guys is than enough...which reminds me!”

Zora reached behind her and pulled out a rather small box, about 9 inches tall at least, but pretty wide, “Open it, Percy.”

Percy took it from her hands, and stared at it in wonder, before looking at Zora again and seeing her nod, she wasted no time in pulling apart the Blue, gold, and orange wrapping paper she had wrapped around it, and the box came with it...she was lost for words, but all she could do was pull out the objects inside it, and stare...A wood carving of all 3 of them, Ramsey, Percy, And Zora. All separate but looking absolutely stunning, “Zora I...I don’t even know what to say...It’s beautiful!”

Zora chuckled again before waving her hand about, “Aw shucks, ya think so? I’ve been doin’ that for days now, almost wasn’t gonna get it done in time...my hands don’t work anymore, but seein’ your reaction makes it worthwhile.”

Percy set them down in her lap, and merely eyed them, Zora and Ramsey eyed them as well...it was magnificent!

Zora would make a sly smile at Ramsey, the kind of one that expressed the emotion of, “I win!” but Ramsey could only raise a hand and wave a finger, taking the rather large box in his hand and ripping it open, there was no box this time, merely paper covering it, “I think I win this time around, Zora.”

He tapped Percy on the shoulder and held up what it was, it made them both gasp in surprise...it was a drawing, but not just any one…”It’s a drawing of all of us, at Redwood Run...the place we all found out our feelins’ for each other.”

Zora, Percy, And Ramsey were all drawn exceptionally, all their best features being captured like an Artist admiring his work, they were all holding hands outside the Sheriff's office...Percy in between them, while Zora and Ramsey stared at each other, one in fear and one in anger...they had really come a long way, haven’t they?

Zora spoke up first, turning away and holding her hat down to the lowest point, covering her face that was as red as a tomato, “Y-You win this time Rat...I swear, you really do know how to one up me, huh?” She chuckled, and refused to turn her face the other way...she couldn’t let them see her like this.

Percy on the other hand...shed a tear, and then another one, and then more fell until it was like a waterfall, Ramsey Immediately panicked, putting a hand on her shoulder and speaking, “Woah woah Percy, what’s wrong!? Is it the drawing? Did I do something bad-” Ramsey’s sentence was paused as he felt his lips close up when she Kissed him, she pulled away almost Immediately and grabbed Zora’s head as well, turning it around and performing the same actions...she spoke again, “I really don’t deserve you two...you’re just amazing.”

They both stared at her, Ramsey’s entire cheeks golden while Zora looked like she was about to explode like a Volcano...they could only say the same thing, 4 words that Cemented her status as there wife, “We love you, Percy!”

She dragged them both into a hug, squeezing them tight...pure bliss, a hug that she would never want to get out of...she began to stroke Zora’s hair, and got an amazing idea, “Zora! I have a great Idea for a present! Would you like me to braid your hair-”

Zora shot up and stared at her, pointing a finger angrily, ready to shout...before dropping it and assuming a soft, embarrassed face while rubbing her arm, “Yes please…” Percy got up with a smile, her tears disappearing long ago, and grabbed Zora’s shoulder before turning her around and already beginning to rub her hair, “It’s quite soft...do you wash it a lot?” Zora could only nod, no words could come out...this was both heaven and hell at the same time.

Ramsey spoke up now, with a smug voice and making a cat like face, “Is Zora Salazar gettin’ embarrassed at havin’ her hair braided-” He was cut off by a loud shout from her, “Shut it, Rat!”

He immediately hid behind the couch, quivering and speaking to Percy, “I’m hidin’ here for Christmas!”

Percy giggled slightly, and made a soft sort of comment, “Oh stop it you two…”

And so, Christmas carried on, the redwood Trio enjoying both pure serenity and bliss...in the solace of each others company.

  
  
  
  



End file.
